The Guardian Angel

A woman is walking on the road and a voice shouts out, "Don't take a step further."

She obeys and suddenly a ton of bricks fall on the place where she would have otherwise been.

She thinks she imagined it and keeps walking until suddenly the voice calls out again.

"Don't take a step further." She stops and a car skids past.

Then suddenly she hears the voice saying "I am your guardian angel, and I will warn you before something bad happens to you. Now do you have any questions to ask me?"

Yes! Shouts the woman, "Just where were you on my wedding day!"

Poor guy is getting Married

Husband:  Honey, I invited a friend home for supper.

Wife: What? Are you crazy? 
        The house is a mess, 
        I didn't go shopping, 
        all the dishes are dirty, 
        and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!

Husband: I know all that.

Wife: Then, why did you invite a friend for supper?

Husband: Because the poor guy is thinking about getting married.

Two Rings in Marriage

There are only two rings in marriage, 


"the wedding ring" 

and "the suffering"

Dying Man and his Will

Lying on his deathbed, a wealthy man was instructing his lawyer on last-minute changes in his will.

Man : I wish to leave everything I own, to my wife.

        However, there is one stipulation.

Lawyer : And that is?

Man : In order to inherit, she must marry within six months of my death.

Lawyer : Why make such an unusual request?

Man : Because I want someone to be sorry I died.

I got Married

A man was complaining to a friend,

Man: I had it all, money, a beautiful house, a nice car, a great motorcycle, the love of a beautiful woman. Then it was all gone!

Friend: What happened?

Man: I married that woman!

Wedding Jokes : Kid and his Mom

Little kid and his Mom at wedding party,

Kid : "Mommy, why does the girl wear white?"

Mom : "Because she's happy and this is the happiest day of her life."

Kid :  "Well then, why is the boy wearing black?"